How does a Metal Wizard perform his spells?

He ChromeCasts. anDruid humor.

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What do you call a dissection performed by drunks?

An Autipsy.

What do you say when a Polish magician performs a magic trick?

Nailed it

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Why is it spelled 'cancelled' in the UK, but 'canceled' in the US?

Because the US gave the UK that L back in 1776.

How do you spell elephant ?

E-l-l-e-e-f-a-n-t "That's not how the dictionary spells it" "You didn't ask me how the dictionary spelt it !"