How many Scene kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Some obscure number, you've probably never heard of it

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How many people from rio does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A Brazilian. Saw this joke elsewhere and thought i'd share it here.

Why did the carpenter's wife leave him?

He was screwing around when he was supposed to be nailing her.

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Why did the movie scene have a rusty pan?

Because Rusty thought the scene in the book was better. I'll show myself out. This is a horrible joke.

What do you call a drunk who happens upon the scene of a crime?

an innocent bystumbler