What does an illustrator say to his girlfriend on Valentine ?

I'm font of you.

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Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do you call a trombone player who just broke up with his girlfriend?

Homeless.

Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

Valentine Jokes More Valentine Jokes

What celestial body do you give your sweetie on valentines day?

An exoplanet.

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!