Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

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Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What said a person who got run over by a car?

I'm tired".

What do you call a person who doesn't care that he just got kicked out of a Call of Duty team?

unfazed*

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the man sleep under the tractor?

Because he wanted to wake up oily.

What did Sherlock ask his friend when he wanted to know what they were having for dinner?

Watson the menu

2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

Why were episodes 4, 5, 6 made before 1, 2, 3?

Because in charge Yoda was.

Why were there only 40,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo?

They only had 2 trucks

Fry Jokes More Fry Jokes

What did the art major say to the law major?

Would you like fries with that "

Why do irish fried beans only have 239 beans?

Because the extra bean would be too farty.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

Why did the personal trainer break up with his girlfriend?

She just wasn't working out.

What do Kim Kardashian, and my girlfriend have in common?

They're both made up.

1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb ?

1 or 2 ? 1... or 2...

What's the difference between a mouse and a rat?

A: 1 has a less likely chance of survival in the dog pound

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

What did the burglar give his wife for her birthday?

A stole.

What do you call a stolen Tesla Car?

Edison.

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

Why is learning English confusing when you're camping?

Because running is past tents.

What did Amelia Earhart learn?

Triplane fuel can't melt sea beams.

Discipline Jokes More Discipline Jokes

Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

How do you discipline your pet rock?

You hit rock bottom!

Defend Jokes More Defend Jokes

How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris?

Nobody knows because they've never tried

What kind of stationary can't you defend yourself with?

A TACK