When my laptop asks "Are you sure?

it's because it still remembers all of the other bad decisions I have made.

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

When two bears asked a pastor to marry them in the forest, what did he say?

Hold on, let me get my bear rings."

What did the artist ask Shakespeare when he was sketching his portrait?

2B or not 2B?

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Californians don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw in hot tubs. (I remember this from the 1970s when I was in middle school. It's one of my first dirty jokes)

What bleeds once a month in the mouth?

Me, when I remember to floss once a month. Edit: account got hacked and showed something different. Sorry about that

Laptop Jokes More Laptop Jokes

Which laptop has the most pleasant speakers?

A Dell

What do you call a laptop that sings?

A Dell