Why is football the single best sport?

Because americans don't play it.

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Why does Helen Keller play the piano with only one hand?

Because she uses the other one to sing.

Why can't americans play LoL?

They can't guard their towers.

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Why do americans like to visit Rome so much?

Because it reminds them of home.

Why are americans bad at DotA ?

Because they cant defend their towers.

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How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

What wind is best for footballs?

Drew Brees