Why was the redditor banned?

Voat manipulation.

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What did the redditor do at the restaurant when he was done with his meal?

Tips waitress*

Why are Redditors so good at fencing?

Because they always riposte.

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What do you get if you insert human DNA into a chimpanzee?

A. Banned from the Zoo.

What would Jesus actually do?

Probably ban nail guns