Why were the Three Wise Men covered in soot?

Because they came from afar.

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Why did the Kurd bury his music collection?

His tribesman said "ISIL is approaching, and they're coming for Yazidis."

Why is there music coming out of your printer?

That will be the paper jamming again!"

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How do you offend a vegan?

Cover your ears with your hands

What do you call a doctor who is trained in neurosurgery and is covering for a gynecologist?

A pervert.