How do narcissists remember everything?

They have a photogenic memory.

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How do you get your stomach pumped?

Swallow a speaker playing "Remember the Name"

How did God make Himself?

I have to remember to start getting high before bedtime.

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How many narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one. All he has to do is hold it in place while the world revolves around him.

How many Narcissists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. But he doesn't screw it in, he just holds it and the world revolves around him.