How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb ?

1 or 2 ? 1... or 2...

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What has 2 legs and bleeds profusely?

Half a cat

Why does Euler's Number say it's "going number 2" when it pees?

Because its natural log is 1. I'll show myself out now.

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How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb ?

One

What did Michael Jackson say at the bank?

Make that change"

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What is better than 10 dead babies in a trashcan?

1 dead baby in 10 trashcans.

What's worse than 5 dead babies in 1 trash can?

1 dead baby in 5 trash cans