What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?

He wiped his bum.

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Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do you call a drummer who just broke up with his girlfriend?

Homeless

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a cow?

Cows are real.

Bum Jokes More Bum Jokes

How do you get stuck in an annoying conversation with a stranger?

Ask someone vaping if you can bum a cigarette.

What's the difference between toilet paper and a knife?

Oh, you don't know I won't ask you to wipe my bum then.

Wipe Jokes More Wipe Jokes

What does Magneto do when his computer gets dirty?

He wipes the hard drive.

Who will I share the sunset with now?

sobs* Friend: Bad breakup Me: No. *wipes tears* My Instagram isn't working.