What did the depressed, illiterate pepperoni slice say when asked where he was with his life?

Well it pizza heck out of me.

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

What do you call someone who isn't a redhead but colors there hair red later in life?

A trans-ginger

What should you do when life gives you melons?

Get tested for dyslexia.

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How does a chef ask to leave the dinner table?

He says, "Gourmet I be excused?"

How do you know if someone's a vegan?

When you ask them "Are you a vegan?" and they say "Yes".