Where'v you been all day?

At the beauty salon" "Were they closed! "

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Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What do you call a turtle who sleeps during the day and is awake at night?

Nocturtle

What happened to sneaking out and getting drunk in the woods?

Teenagers these days be all "I hate you mom I'm joining ISIS."

Close Jokes More Close Jokes

How often do you guys close your internet tabs?

One of mine is from the Kerry/Edwards campaign.

How do you know that there's a monster in your bath?

You can't get the shower curtain closed.

Beauty Salon Jokes More Beauty Salon Jokes

Where'v you been all day?

At the beauty salon" "Were they closed! "

How do I look?

I just came back from the beauty salon.... Husband - Well. Was it closed