Why is Charlie Sheen always seen smiling?

Because he's so damn positive!

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Why don't apples smile when you go bobbing ?

Because they're crab apples !

Who's there ! Aardvark ! Aardvark who ?

Aardvark a million miles for one of your smiles !

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What grocery store does Charlie Sheen frequently visit?

Rite Aid

Where does Charlie Sheen shop?

At Winners.