How can I trust you again?

H: She meant nothing to me! M: Not that. You bought lite sour cream!

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Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why was the Muslim sad when he bought a pirated disc?

Because the Disc was cracked

Where do you buy a baby?

Hole Foods.

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

How's a fart and a teenager alike?

Because once you go to sleep, you can't trust either of them to not sneak out.

Why should you never trust a one armed philosophy professor?

He never mentions "on the other hand"

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

Why do tennis players never get married?

Because Love means nothing to them.

How many Freudian psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the ladder and one to screw your mother - I mean light bulb!

M Jokes More M Jokes

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a Pizza?

A pizza can feed a family of four. Im sorry if I've offended any pizzas.

Whats a gf?

Mom: if youre a good boy, youll get one when youre older. Son: What is Im not a good boy? Mom: Youll get many.

H Jokes More H Jokes

Why is Jay-Z allowed to ride in the carpool lane by himself?

Because his name is Hov, OH, H-to-the-O-V

Why isn't he responding to us?

I'm annoyed H I A N N O Y E D I M D A D