How did the hipster burn her tongue?

She ate her soup before it was cool

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why did the blonde give up on trying to blow up a car?

She burnt her lips on the exhaust pipe

What happened to the Irishman who tried to blow up a school bus?

He burned his lips on the exhaust pipe.

Eat Jokes More Eat Jokes

What qualifies as a "short stack" of pancakes?

I mean, 2.5 feet is relatively short, right Yes Okay cool. Then I just ate a short stack.

Why did the man with an electric car think he had a dual exhaust?

He drank a lot of beer. He ate a lot of beans. *You love it.*

Soup Jokes More Soup Jokes

What's this fly doing in my soup?

The waiter responds, "The backstroke."

Why do the Irish only put 239 beans in their soup?

Because one more bean would be too farty.