How do footballers send messages?

By referee-mail.

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Why doesn't Mexico send a team to the Summer Olympics?

Because all the one that can run, jump, or swim are already in the US.

Why did the pig send his story to New York?

He wanted to be published on Pork Avenue.

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Why is it difficult to break up with a Japanese girlfriend?

Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get the message.

How does a farmer send messages?

By e-i-e-i-o-mail.

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What did the German Footballer name his pet?

Schweinsteiger.

Where do footballers dance?

At a football!