How do you get your wife to listen to every word without interrupting?

Talk in your sleep.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What happens when you sing a country music song backwards?

You get your wife, truck, and land back.

What's worse than finding out that your wife has cancer?

Finding out it's curable.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What do you get if you cross a parrot with a woodpecker ?

A bird that talks in morse code !

Why doctor?

Doctor: "Because I'm trying to talk to you, and it's very distracting."

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

Why won't a woman sleep with you after a date at Burger King?

Because you have to court her before you pound her.

Whats the best part about sleeping with a midget?

You're sure to get a little head

Interrupt Jokes More Interrupt Jokes

What do you call a president who interrupts people?

Donald Tr- WRONG!

How do you interrupt a Redditor's winning streak?

The Game

Listen Jokes More Listen Jokes

Why don't north Koreans listen to funk?

Cos they've got no Seoul! Thank you very much.

Why did the parasite listen to the clock?

A: Because it liked the tick talk.

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

How do you say the word "peanuts" *without* the letter "t"?

Think about it.

What has one "n", two "g"s, an "i", "e", and an "r" and you can only say this word when you belong to this group?

ginger