How do you keep a lawyer from drowning?

You take your foot off the top of their head.

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

What do cells say when their sister shoots their foot?

Mitosis

What does a pirate call three feet?

A YAAAARRRRGGGG!! Oh look a door.

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

Why is it that New Jersey got all the toxic waste dumps and California got all the lawyers?

New Jersey had first choice.

Why is it dangerous for a lawyer to walk onto a construction site when plumbers are working?

Because they might connect the drain line to the wrong suer.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

How do you cure a headache?

A: Put your head through a window and the pane will just disappear!

What do members of secret societies use when they get a head cold?

An Illumi-neti pot