How do you make two Oboists play in tune with one another?

Shoot one of them.

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Why can't Mexicans play Uno?

They always steal the green cards.

When do ghosts play tricks on each other?

On April Ghoul's Day

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What does it sound like to shoot yourself in the foot twice?

Pao! Pao!

Why don't black people sleep?

Because the only one that had a dream was shot.

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What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?

You can tune a guitar but you can't tuna fish.

What was Beethoven's favorite food?

BA-NA-NA-NAAA!!!!! (to the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)