Who writes all his plays on the Internet?

Will-e. Shakespeare.

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What do you call it when batman plays hooky from church?

Christian Bale

What is Siri really good at?

Playing pocket pool.

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Where do you go to get a burger on the internet?

McDownloads!

When I was your age... When I was your age, before the Internet, there was none of this e-bola. We just had plain bola. And you know what?

We were thankful.

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What do you call heavy metal music written about fruit?

Applecore. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did blonde open a fishcan in a shop?

Because on top of it was written : Open here.