How would Arnold Schwarzenegger describe a sousaphone?

It's not a tuba!"

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Why is Dave Mustaine described as "heavy metal"?

Because he sings lead. (Better read than said.)

How do you describe a Swede, who's not really a Swede?

Swed-ish.

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What kind of photograph does Arnold Schwarzenegger take?

Polaroids.

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when invited to the musician themed costume party?

I'll be Bach

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What instrument was the predecessor to the tuba?

The oneba

What did the tuba say to the clarinet?

Nothing, instruments don't talk.