What did Descartes say while shopping online?

I think therefore I Amazon

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why did the lady stare at the orange juice?

Because she thought it was telling her to concentrate!

Why did the dog's friends send her home from the bar when she started to act strange?

They thought she might have been slipped a woofie.

Amazon Jokes More Amazon Jokes

Why can't you be successful like your brother?

Amazon: heh Optimus: But I saved humanity from Decepticons! Thanksgiving at the Primes

Why do fanfic writers like Amazon Prime?

They get free two-day shipping.

Shop Jokes More Shop Jokes

What do you get if you cross a labrador and a tortoise ?

A dog that will run to the shop to get your paper and bring back last weeks paper !

How do you spell "SHOP"?

Me: S-H-O-P Friend: How do you say it Me: "Shop" Friend: What do you do when you get to a green light