What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?

Put it on my bill

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Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a duck?

A bird that lays down !

How do you know it's safe to feed the ducks the same thing as the Canadian geese down at the pond?

Because what's good the goose is good for Merganser.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why shouldn't you buy underwear made in the Ukraine?

Because Chernobyl fallout.

What would be a terrible name for a new beer?

Q: What would be a terrible name for a new beer A: "Mondays"...because no one would EVER want to buy a case of the Mondays...

Bill Jokes More Bill Jokes

Why doesn't Monica Lewinsky like going to the doctor?

He always shoves a Bill down her throat!

Why was Hillary thrown out of a restaurant?

She trashed the bill. Alt punch line 1 (u/Causative): She demanded her own private server and tried to have her meals removed.

Lipstick Jokes More Lipstick Jokes

What's the difference between Ellen Pao and a pitbull?

Lipstick

Why do they call it "Lipstick?

When a woman can easily move her lips after she applies it