What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?

Put it on my bill

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Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What did Buddy Fletcher, accused ponzi scheme runner and husband of reddit's CEO, say to the duck?

deleted

What do you call a duck being kidnapped?

An abduction. I'll quietly leave through this conveniently placed door.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

How are you supposed to buy a gift for your mom as an adult?

It's like, oh you gave birth to me Please enjoy this fancy candle.

What do you call it when you buy stocks of a clothing company?

A good in-vest-ment

Bill Jokes More Bill Jokes

What does a Bills fan do when they win the superbowl?

He turns off his xbox.

Why was Hillary thrown out of a restaurant?

She trashed the bill. Alt punch line 1 (u/Causative): She demanded her own private server and tried to have her meals removed.

Lipstick Jokes More Lipstick Jokes

Why do Avon ladies walk funny?

because their lipstick

Why did the blonde have lipstick all over her steering wheel?

She was trying to blow the horn