What is the chance we are alone in the universe?

Professor: Astronomical.

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Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

How do you know the universe likes Saturn?

It put a ring on it.

Which place has the strongest gravity in the whole universe?

Bed

Chance Jokes More Chance Jokes

Why do they print nutritional information on Snickers bars?

If you don't know candy is bad for you, what are the chances you can read

Why do the /r/jokes moderators like chess?

It's the only chance they have to mate.

Professor Jokes More Professor Jokes

What do you call it when Professor X does a wheelie?

Professor +

What happens when you offend a professor of various human aspects?

You owe them an anthrapology