What's a schizophrenic's favorite Christmas song?

Do You Hear what I Hear?

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What do you get a kid without arms for Christmas?

Gloves, but he doesn't know that yet.. since he can't open it.

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas ?

A merry Christmas to ewe

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl using the restroom?

Because they're extinct

Whats this new apple product I keep hearing about?

A: Whats this new apple product I keep hearing about? B: Which one? A: the I-sis