What's the hardest thing about having a colostomy bag?

Finding shoes to go with it.

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Why are quantum physicists bad lovers?

When they find the position, they can't find the momentum. When they find the momentum, they can't find the position.

How do we know that Jesus wasn't born in Mexico?

Because he'd never have been able to find 3 wise men and a virgin.

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What did the shoes say to the pants?

What up, britches?

What should you do before criticizing Pac-Man?

WAKA WAKA WAKA mile in his shoes

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What is the hardest thing about learning to ride a bicycle?

The road.

What is the hardest thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?

You have to drop the bomb on her twice before she gets it. I'm going to hell..