What should I tell him?

Doc says, "Tell him I can't see him today."

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell 2 Scotsmen apart?

You lift their kilts, and whichever one of them has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!

What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?

DAM! (airplane stewardess told me and had me on ground laughing)

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Why put off until tomorrow what you can do today?

Me: It'll be higher quality and less tense for everyone if we wait Boss: Today!

How woke?

Me: We're putting Harriet Tubman on something that enslaves us all today.

Doc Jokes More Doc Jokes

What's up, Doc?

he's legitimately concerned.

What's the prognosis, Doc?

DOCTOR: You've got cancer. ME: WHAT ! DOCTOR: Haha. Jk. I'm not a doctor.