When can't a pencil write out a check?

When it's broke.

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What does a cow do after a break up?

Mooves on.

Why did the band 999 megabytes break up?

Because they couldn't get a gig.

Pencil Jokes More Pencil Jokes

Where does Dracula buy his pencils?

Pennsylvania.

What kind of stretches does a pencil do?

Ticondeyoga

Check Jokes More Check Jokes

What do you do at a red light?

Me: "I usually respond to texts and check my Twitter."

What did the vulture say when the airline agent asked if he wanted to check his luggage?

No, thanks, it's just carrion...

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

Who wrote "The Open Kimono"?

Seymour Hare.

What do you call an apology written using dots and dashes?

Re-morse code