Who's the artist you find in the supermarket?

Salvador Deli

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What should you do if you find a 500-pound dog asleep on your bed?

Sleep on the sofa.

Which snakes are found on cars?

Windscreen vipers.

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Why did the artist throw his eraser away?

Because it wasn't

Why couldn't the artist get a driver's license?

He gave off a good Impression, but couldn't make a Van Gogh.

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Where in the supermarket would you find the Dalai Lama?

Eggs-aisle.

What did one Muslim say to another in a supermarket?

Nothing very interesting, they are both completely ordinary members of society who should not be judged based on their ethnic background and skin colour... ...And then the building exploded.

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What did the surrealist butcher name his shop?

Salvador Deli

What do you call a person who makes surrealist sandwiches?

Salvador Deli.