Why did the calendar give up on life?

Because he felt his days were numbered.

Previous Random Joke Next

Life Jokes More Life Jokes

Why do artists die early in life?

Too many strokes.

Why is there no life on Mars?

No WiFi...

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What day does the egg fear most?

Fry-day

Why did the cheerleader get kicked out on her last day of school?

x-post from /r/punny Because you can't end on a prep position.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How did the blind skydiver know he was about to hit the ground?

He felt the slack in his dog's leash.

Where does He-Man keep his towel?

BY THE SHOWER OF GREYSKULL!!! I wrote this joke today. Feel free to steal it.

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

for 2 weeks.

What do giraffes and humans share the same number of?

Testicles.

Calendar Jokes More Calendar Jokes

Why was the calendar depressed?

His days were numbered.

What's the difference between the calendar and you?

A calendar has a date on Valentine's day.