Why do Asians like to have military time on?

So they can do math

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What do you call a guy who likes touching unripened cheese?

A fetaphile

What did you like most about your last job?

ME: *leans in way too close* Leaving it.

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How do bovines do math?

They use a cow-culator! Ba-dum-tsss!

What does Math stand for?

Mental Abuse To Humans

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Why can't Asians make white babies?

Because two Wongs don't make a white

How can you tell if Asians have broken into your house?

The dog is gone, the homework is done, and they're still trying to get out of the driveway.