What do you call a guy who likes touching unripened cheese?

A fetaphile

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What do you call a spider that likes 80s music?

A Durantula.

Why did the Smackhead kick the habit?

He didn't like nuns.

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Why are so many guys mean to their girl friends ?

Because of the .

What do you call a guy with no legs at your front door?

Matt

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What do black guys have that's double the size of white men and gets bigger every time they touch a woman?

A. Their criminal record

What do you call an astronaut that doesn't like being touched?

A personal space man