Why do husbands typically die before their wives?

They want to.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why do Italian men grow moustaches?

They want to look like their mothers.

Why did the philanthropist learn how to subtract?

Because he wanted to make a difference. My first original, time for open mic!

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why did the wizards wife have hickeys on her neck?

Because he was a neck-romancer....

What does the snowman call his wife?

Snowblower

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

How do most vegans die?

Malnutrition.

Why did the elephant paint his balls green?

Answer: to hide in avocado trees.. How did Tarzan die? Answer: Picking avocados

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

How many walruses does it take to make a sandwich?

Don't be silly, walruses don't make sandwiches; women make sandwiches. Made this up to bug my sister. It worked. Her husband laughed.

How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"