Why don't paperclips move around a lot?

They like being stationery.

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What did the scientist say at the bar?

I'd like some H20 please.

What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?

People in Dubai don't like the Flintstones but people in Abu Dhabi doooooo.

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How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A lot, apparently. Have you seen their new building?

What's the normal amount of hair to mail someone?

I feel like this is a lot of hair I'm mailing to someone