How do you catch a whale?

You wait until last call and use a good pick up line.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

When I'm dead, I'm going to haunt offices and say, "OooOoo... why are you using your mouse?

hit Control-C... you're taking forever..."

What kind of laundry detergent do handicapped people use?

Downy. I apologize for this one, it's pretty mean. I really do sympathize with handicapped people.

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

What does Pokemon Go and a policeman have in common?

You gotta catch Jamal

Why don't Pokemon cards ever have any typos?

Because the editors know that they gotta catch 'em all!

Whale Jokes More Whale Jokes

What is a whales favorite pasttime?

Netflix and krill.

What's worse than a whale with a sore tooth?

When you go to kiss your grandma goodbye and she slips you the tongue.

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

What gift do you want?

HUSBAND: "An English girl." After a month, wife returns.. HUSBAND: "Where is my gift " WIFE: "Wait for nine months!"

Who has time to monitor followers/unfollowers?

I can barely keep track of my kids and I only have 1 of those. Wait. Two. I have 2 kids.