How do you find and old man in the dark?

Just feel around. It's not hard.

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How many bugs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, as long as they can find a way in.

What would Abraham Lincoln say if he found out there was a movie about him slaying vampires?

What's a movie?

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How does a tail pipe feel after a long car ride?

exhausted.

What do vegetables watch when they're feeling frisky?

Cornography

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Where is everyone beautiful?

In the dark.

What do you call a kid that is afraid of the dark?

Racist

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What did the woman from Finland say after seeing an old man fall in the water, knowing he couldn't swim?

Oh no, Helsinki! He Finnish!"

Why don't old men like old women?

Ever tried to peel apart a grilled cheese sandwich