How do you get a Canadian to quit smoking cigarets?

You ask him politely.

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How does a seamstress reply to someone asking her how her day was?

So,so.....

What exactly is going on?

I asked. He replied, "A Major engineering feet."

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What'll it be kid?

Seal plops a five on the counter and says "Anything but a Canadian Club."

How did the bad Canadian fisherman describe his only catch of the day?

Aboot this big"

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Why did the man quit his job at the bakery?

He didn't knead any more dough.

Why did Chris Benoit quit wrestling?

He wanted to hang with his family.