How many house flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just the standard two, but I'll be damned if I know how they got in there.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What happens when a lumberjack doesn't know which tree to cut next?

He gets stumped.

Why do Italians wear gold chains?

So they know where to stop shaving.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

What do you get when you cross the world's most famous skater with the world's best physicist?

A video game so realistic, when you screw up you have to play in a wheelchair.

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Not sure, first they have to figure out which way to spin it.

Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

What does Shakespeare say when he is angry with his dog?

Out, out, damned Spot!

What's the difference between a bad golfer, and a bad skydiver?

The golfer goes " Damn!" The skydiver goes "Damn! "

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many blonde's does it take to screw In a light bulb?

3: One holds the light bulb, and the other two spin the Chair.

How many Global Warming nutjobs does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they don't use light bulbs. They live in caves and use no forms of artificial energy because they wouldn't want to be perceived as hypocrites or morons.