What candy do you give your wife before you get married?

Pre-nup brittle.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

How many pull-ups can you do?

Me: 22. Wife: How many with witnesses Me: Almost 1.

Why do woman out live men?

They don't have wives

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why did the IT Admin marry Sally?

She had a 19" rack.

What did Jay-Z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

Candy Jokes More Candy Jokes

How do sheep divide candy?

They all get their fair shear

Why do they print nutritional information on Snickers bars?

If you don't know candy is bad for you, what are the chances you can read