What did the chef say when he noticed his scales were broken?

No weigh...

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

How did Helen Keller break her arm?

She broke it trying to read the road signs.

Which servant of Jehovah was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?

A. Moses. Because he broke all 10 commandments at once.

Chef Jokes More Chef Jokes

How does a chef ask to leave the dinner table?

He says, "Gourmet I be excused?"

What do you call someone who belongs in the kitchen?

A Chef of course...

Notice Jokes More Notice Jokes

Why did no one notice Thor's brother?

Because he was low-key

Why shouldn't violists take up mountaineering?

A: Because if they get lost it takes ages before anyone notices that they're missing.

Scale Jokes More Scale Jokes

Why did the lizard go on a diet ?

It weighed too much for its scales !

What do you call a scale that always resets itself to zero?

Tareable

Weigh Jokes More Weigh Jokes

How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.

Where's the best place to weigh a pie?

Some-where over the rain-bow... Weigh a pie.