What did the hipster epidemiologist say to United States citizens at a press conference?

You probably won't get it.

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United States Jokes More United States Jokes

What's the United States favorite brand of shortening?

San Fran Crisco

What do Ohio and Mackerels have in common?

Nothing! Ohio is the only state in the United States that's name shares no letters with the word mackerel.

United States Citizen Jokes More United States Citizen Jokes

What did the hipster epidemiologist say to United States citizens at a press conference?

You probably won't get it.

What do you call a lazy immigrant ?

A United States citizen