What did the suicidal college student say to his room mate?

Dont leave me hangin' bro

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Why couldn't the cow leave the farm?

She was pasteurized!

What do they do with Tickle-Me-Elmo's before he leaves the factory?

Give him a couple of test-tickles.

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What did one tectonic plate say to the other tectonic plate?

Bro, do you even shift?"

What did the Kiwi say to the Statue?

Statue bro?

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What do Hillary supporters call their room mate?

Nurse.

What did the suicidal college student say to his room mate?

Dont leave me hangin' bro