What is the best stand-up routine of our time?

I nominate Chris Rock's Never Scared.

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

Why couldn't the animals on Noah's Ark play cards?

A: Because Noah was standing on the deck!

What is taller when it sits down than when it stands up?

A dog.

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What did the god of lightning say after working out for the first time?

I'm Thor

What do you call an Asian who's tolerable some of the time?

Occasionally (OK Asian Lee).

Nominate Jokes More Nominate Jokes

What's the real reason Lego Movie didn't get nominated for an Oscar?

They thought it was called "The Leo Movie".

What is the best stand-up routine of our time?

I nominate Chris Rock's Never Scared.