What is the difference between a cheap whore and an expensive whore?

One is your mom the other one gets paid more.

This joke may have profanity.

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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train the other trains the mind.

What's the difference between a kid and a cat?

Who has the diploma when you get rid of them.

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Because he was spaced out.

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What's the difference between your mom and my computer?

I can still turn your mom on.

What about your mom?

No, no. Dad wouldn't allow that."