What's an Apple Scottish self-aware computer called?

I, Mac.

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Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

Why did Eric Clapton make the switch from PC to Apple?

Well because he had a horrible experience with windows. (credit to Neil Hamburger for this amazing joke)

What lives in apples and is an avid reader?

A bookworm !

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'

Why do Scottish men wear kilts instead of jeans?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Mac Jokes More Mac Jokes

How do Jedis close their programs on a Mac?

They use Force quit.

Why can't a Mac sing?

Because it's not Adele