What's the only thing politicians stand for?

Reelection.

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's the only thing worse than finding a roach in your food?

Finding half of a roach in your food.

What was the last thing Daedalus said to Icarus?

You've got a lot of potential, son."

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

Why do women have shorter feet?

So they can stand closer to the kitchen counter.

When is the appropriate time to kick a midget in the balls?

A: When he is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

What do sperm and politicians have in common?

About 1 in every 500 or 600 million have a chance at becoming human.

What's the difference between a politician and an actor?

One acts solely for money, the other is the actor.