Where does Sean Connery keep his guns?

In the library of course. They're for shelf-defense.

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Sean Connery Jokes More Sean Connery Jokes

Why isn't Sean Connery allowed to play Super Mario Bros. any more?

He kept trying to shave the princess.

Why was Sean Connery accused of piracy while drinking tea?

He took a ship.

Course Jokes More Course Jokes

How many ears does Captain Kirk have?

Three... The one on the left The one on the right And of course, the Final Front Ear

How do you help a choking pig?

With the Ham-Lick maneuver of course

Gun Jokes More Gun Jokes

Who wants two tickets to the gun show?

I bought the Groupon but can't make it :(

Why is a gun better than a woman?

You can buy a silencer for a gun

Library Jokes More Library Jokes

What is the tallest building in the entire world?

Q: What is the tallest building in the entire world? A: The library, because it has so many stories.

What's the tallest building in your city?

The library, because it has the most stories.