Who has one thumb and survived a band saw accident?

This guy!!!

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Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What do you call a girl who expects a guy to do everything for her, make all the first moves, and text her first every day?

SINGLE

What happened to the guy who farted in church?

He sat in his own pew.

Survive Jokes More Survive Jokes

What do you call a soldier who survived pepper spray and mustard gas?

A seasoned veteran

Who survives?

America.

Thumb Jokes More Thumb Jokes

What has two thumbs and got laid last night?

My hands.

Where does the thumb meet its type?

At the SPACE BAR! reddit is fun! I'm staring at the keyboard tryin' to think up a joke and voila'!