Who isn't allowed to watch PG movies?

Orphans.

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What do you call fruits that aren't allowed to marry?

OC Cantaloupes.

Why aren't kids under the age of 18 allowed to watch videos about duck calls without the consent of a parent?

Because they contain a lot of fowl language.

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Why couldn't the pregnent women watch all of the Harry Potter movies?

Because they lactate.

Why did the traitor wear two watches?

Because he's a two timer.

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What are the best kinds of speedbumps?

Orphan shaped ones.

Why did the inventor of panadol think I had no parents?

I said I'm an orphan.